Hooray,Yippee!

Oh if only I’d thought about priorities instead of running ahead at a hundred miles an hour. First I had to realise that being a mother is as much of a calling as the academic stuff!

I’ve always loathed thay wretched perfect woman in Proverbs 31! But there she is getting her house in order looking after the kids and and is doing such a good job that her husband praises her. v. 25 says that she laughs at the days to come!

That verse irks me most because thats my failing, never trusting or planning enough, muddling along and hoping for the best instead. Well , I’d like to laugh at the days to come….. time to get your house in order and get your priorities right!

What brought all this on? Aberdeen uni has offered me a place which will allow me to do my degree in modules on the PHONE! ( that Proverbs gal didn’t haveone of those!)

Time to do the house work, look after the children and study and NO travelling in the dark winter days!!!

Lord, teach me to be quiet and listen to that still small voice! Thank you for dealing with the most minute details . My God is an AWESOME God!

My prayer for today….I realize, Lord, that these gifts YOU have given me, my children, won’t always be perfect. ( I know YOU could make the same statement about me.) Help me to see their lives through Your eyes. Help their characters to be of more value to me than their performance; their heart attitudes more important than the circumstances; their temperaments more important than my trinkets. Don’t let me ever get so caught up in my own existence that I cannot rejoice in the lives of the children You have entrusted to my care. Give me a rejoicing heart today, dear Lord….AmenIt really reveals my heart for them….I can’t do this without HIM… I can’t be the mom HE needs me to be without HIM… and I need to talk to HIM all day long…from my heart.

Flummoxed

Well he whispered in my ear,”Who feels stupid now!”

Have you ever been in that place where you yell at God “Well what now?” I prayed, I thought I was following His leading. The house became available,the rent and deposit got paid, my moving expenses were paid. All seemed to be going well. Then…………. the timetable came, completely unworkable even with childcare. I had to leave before breakfast club began and would have got home long after after school club finished.

I love my children ,I am a mother first. So there I was torn between my dream and the care of my children. It wasn’t a difficult decision to make , but oh do I feel confused. Want to scream WHY?!

Am at present trying to find a distance learning degree course on line.So far have had no replys to my E.mails. Also looking into a counselling course.

Listening acutely for Gods voice, where to now, did I get it wrong? Did I hear wrong, were the answers to prayer not answers? If anyone can spread any light on this ,tell me!

opposition

So, I didn’t think it would be easy ,but nor did I think that there would be this difficult. I must be on the right track for there to be such vehement opposition.Illness, lack of money, kids finding life SO hard to adjust to.
I’m a Mum first and foremost and knowing that the children will have to use pre and after school clubs is making me feel so guilty.If anyone is reading this, please pray for us.I need to know that they are happy and safe to be able to do this.
I could really do with a live in au pair but student grants don’t run to such things.
Well this will hopefully be the first of many weeks of commuting into Glasgow. Feel excited, apprehensive ,guilty and down right scared at times. A myriad of emotions.If this is Gods calling then all will fall into place.
Hopefully I’ll look back at this post in a week or two and laugh.
Isaiah 41v13-14 For I am the Lord ,your God,who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,Do not fear;I will help you.
Do not be afraid,O worm Jacob,O little Israel, for I myself will help you.Declares the Lord,your Redeemer,thr Holy one of Israel.