The Joy of Jobhunting

I often wonder about the folk who have to write the advertisements for jobs. If you have been reading this blog lately you will know that having found myself a single parent again at 60, I am trying to rejoin the workforce with the help of my friend “Jim” at the Jobcentre. Between us we have not done so well.

I spend a great deal of my time trawling through job sites, and I often have a little giggle at the way something is worded. The word “casual” gets used a lot, a Casual Labourer or shop assistant is often required, does this mean a person who is very relaxed and who turns up  in their old clothes, hands in pockets perhaps chewing a bit of gum,and at some time during the shift  does a bit of work if they feel the need?

Tesco want someone to work in our tiny store attached to the garage, they are “looking for people who have a hunger to work with customers and colleagues…”. Does anyone have a” hunger” to work for Tesco?

Sometimes I just don’t understand the title of the job. For example do you know what a “Guest Services Colleague” does? Sounds quite grand doesn’t it. It’s a cleaner. They can also be a “Housing Assistant”. If the title is fancy , often the salary is too. The Council seem to pay a fair bit for their senior staff,and from the complicated job descriptions they must earn it, but it all seems to involve administration, which I would not have a clue about because my administrator did all that, but she was called the “secretary” then.

At the moment you can apply to be a “financially driven Spa Therapist” ,that says it all, or an “Off shore Rigger” ,the advert tells you about the wonderful accommodation you will get. It doesn’t ,however, mention much about the weather conditions in the North Sea, but the pay looks good.waitress

The one I really wanted to apply for, until I worked out that it would take me 4 hours to get there by public transport ,despite it not being that far away,  was a Seasonal Visitor Assistant for a cafe at a power station. I loved their advert. One of the character traits they request is” to be able to deal with complaints timorously and with hostile customers sensitively.” What kind of cafe do they have, and how do they manage to upset their customers so much in the first place? Do they know that to be timorous is to be fearful?

Sometimes a job looks just the thing, then I realise that the computer programmer didn’t do Geography at school because Chandlers Ford and Shepherds Bush are certainly not in Argyll.

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