Sons and Daughters

Last night I had vivid dreams, I was in a night club with a crowd of pilgrims and a donkey. I was relating this to my daughter at breakfast time and she remarked that she had gone to the living room to get something during the night and the walls of her brother’s bedroom were practically pulsating.

The flat had resembled a Youth Hostel at mid-night when I went to bed ,I must admit. As my son and others have secured their places at colleges and Universities they were having a bit of a shin dig. So why didn’t I hear it ? My bed is against the wall joining his room. I did do a 5 miler with the dogs yesterday afternoon, and had spent the evening finishing Tom Moore’s book “Spanish Steps” where he traverses the pilgrim way from the Pyrenees to Santiago Compostela. That is where the donkey came from. My neighbour however did hear it. She was in the garden at the rear of the flats when I returned from the early morning dog walk. I tentatively said that I hoped that she hadn’t been disturbed. “I heard it.” she replied. I apologised and scarpered.

As I contemplate yet another child leaving home, I try to think what it will be like. I am proud of the way he can make a guitar sing, or play a lovely melody but I will not miss having to put sub titles on the TV so that I can work out what’s happening during a programme. I will not miss being awake at some ungodly hour of the morning wondering if he has fallen in the canal, been mugged or beamed up by aliens. I shall worry instead because I won’t know when he goes out or comes in. No one will be battering on the door because they can’t remember which key it is.

I shan’t miss the total devastation in the kitchen just because he made toast and an entire packet of biscuits being snaffled during the night. I won’t miss stocking up on pies only to find that he now wants burgers. I will miss having to listen to the latest song that a band he has just found , has just brought out, and discovering that I like The Killers, Vampire Weekend , The Arctic Monkeys and lesser known bands.

I won’t miss the foetid washing after he has been to a Festival or dosing him up with remedies to cure the ailments caught by lack of sleep and not much to eat.

I shan’t miss being thrown a pair of jeans to launder ,that are needed in the next hour and no others will do.No one could use as many towels in a week as he does. I shall miss him taking the dog for a walk in the pitch dark and depths of Winter when I can’t face the freezing temperatures.

I shan’t miss the derision when I offer advice or my opinion and being told “Shut up, Mum!” as if I was the most ill informed ,gormless idiot on earth. But I’ll miss the discussions on all kinds of interesting topics. (As long as I let him win).

I shall miss him leaping over the “baby gate” which prevents our ancient smelly terrier biting our spaniel. I shall miss him perching “birdlike” on the arm of the sofa, standing on all the furniture and leaving sticky finger prints on the windows when he is bored and watching the world go by.

Most of all I will miss his company, the most difficult ,frustrating of 6 children to drag up, but it was worth all the effort, rows and tears. You are a great kid!

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2 thoughts on “Sons and Daughters

  1. Wow, what an unambiguous and by the sound of things totally undeserved testimony to a mother’s love.
    Well done you.
    I’ll bet once you’ve grown accustomed to the silence you will begin to enjoy sounds long unheard, like bird-song etc.
    Brace yourself, it’s going to take some getting used to. 🙂

    1. I don’t suppose that any of us deserve the amount of love and care that our parents give us, but they love us any way.
      . I still have my youngest daughter for a couple more years, so I suspect that it won’t be too quiet.

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